Searching For Home
by castlelove1221
Summary: songfic based on the song She Can't Get That by Blake Shelton...rated T for an affair...EO...please RR! better summary inside...


AN: I have wanted to post another story on here for so long and now I finally have!! This is a songfic based on the song "She Can't Get That" by Blake Shelton. Quick background: Elliot is re-separated from Kathy (for good this time) and Olivia is married (though I didn't actually give her husband an identity, he's just "him")...story is EO so it deals with an affair (rated T for the brief part with the affair)...please RR!! I love any and all feedback! Okay enough of that, on with the story...

Disclaimer: Nothing fancy, they just don't belong to me.

**Searching For Home**

She walks in the front door, lays her keys on the table, and pushes the flashing button on the answering machine.

"You have one new message," the robotic voice tells her, the sound echoing through the empty house. "First message: _Hey, baby. It's me. I was hoping to catch you before going to bed, but I guess you had another late night at work. I just wanted to call to tell you how much I miss you and that I'll be home by dinner tomorrow. I love you so much, Olivia. See you tomorrow._"

_[Beep_ "Message deleted. You have no more messages."

Listening to that message only made Olivia more depressed. She walked back into her bedroom, changed into sweatpants and a T-shirt, and laid down on her bed. Hugging her knees to her chest, she willed herself not to cry, but a few tears cut tracks down her cheeks anyway. She stared at her cell phone sitting on the nightstand, knowing that she was going to call him no matter how wrong she knew it was. She gave herself a few moments to back out, but her loneliness got the best of her. Hitting one on the speed dial, she waited for him to answer.

"Hello?" he answered on the third ring.

"Elliot…" her voice trailed off and she was sure he would be able to tell she'd been crying.

"Olivia, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Elliot…" was all she could think to say, the only word she seemed able to form.

"Okay. Your place or mine? Do you want me to drive over there?" he asked, understanding exactly what she wanted even though she couldn't say it.

"No. No, I'll come over there. I just don't want to be alone."

"I know. I'll be here. Just be careful driving, okay? If you're too upset, I can come to you—"

"No," she said firmly, cutting him off. "No, I'll be fine. See you in a few minutes."

She ended the call, grabbed her keys, and rushed out the door, anxious to get away from the emptiness and the pictures of him that made her feel guilty for what she was leaving to do. It was as if his image was staring at her, as if somehow it knew where she went when he was out of town.

When she arrived at his building, she let herself in with the key he had given her and walked up the stairs to his apartment. On the way up, she considered turning back, but she knew she wouldn't leave. She never did, no matter how much she questioned herself—she knew only Elliot could make her feel better and give her the comfort she so desperately needed.

Arriving at his door, Olivia was about to knock when the door swung open and Elliot wrapped his arms around her in an embrace that always made her feel safe. They stood like that for a few moments until Elliot stepped back, took her hands in his, and led her into the apartment. There was a steaming mug of tea waiting for her on the coffee table which she took into her hands as they sat down on the couch together. Elliot put an arm around Olivia's shoulder and pulled her snugly into his chest, knowing that she would talk when she was ready.

"Thank you for the tea," she said finally. "You always know how to make me feel better."

"You're welcome," he replied, "but you don't have to thank me."

"I know, but I still appreciate it."

"Good, I'm glad," he ended.

They sat in comfortable silence for awhile, enjoying each other's company until Olivia put her empty mug down on the table and began speaking again:

"I just hate being alone all the time. He travels so much and I don't even think I love him anymore. Truth be told, I'm not really sure I ever **really** loved him at all…at least not the way I love you. But you weren't there, and he was, and he made me happy for awhile, and I know that's no excuse but when he asked to marry me I said yes even though I know this would happen. I knew that I could never love him the way he loves me but I married him anyway…why? Why did I do that?"

Olivia began sobbing so Elliot pulled her closer to him held her tightly, whispering "Shh, it's alright. Everything's going to be alright."

"No, don't say that. It's not alright," Olivia responded, pulling away from his embrace ever so slightly. "I hate that I do this to him. I hate that I'm an unfaithful wife. But I'd be lying if I said that I'm not happiest when you and I are together. I'd be lying if I said I didn't love you. Because I do, Elliot. I love you so much sometimes it hurts."

"I know," Elliot replied, cupping her face in his hands. "I know because I feel the same way about you. I love you, Olivia. I have always and will always love you," he said as he gently kissed her tear-stained cheeks, wishing he could take away her pain as easily as he could kiss away her tears.

"Elliot…" she sighed. "Elliot, please."

_He meets her at the front door, he can tell she's had a hard day at work_

_She's been needin' him, and he's sure been wantin' her._

_He touches her with tenderness, takes her in his arms and takes it slow_

_What a shame she can't get that at home._

_What a shame she can't get that at home_

_There's nothing back there but a lonely house _

_And love ain't all about wood and stone._

_He satisfies all her needs and wants_

_What a shame she can't get that at home._

He brought his lips down to hers and kissed her softly yet passionately. Before she could deepen the kiss, he pulled away, stood up, and pulled her up from the couch to lead her into the bedroom. Once there he resumed kissing her, this time allowing her to deepen it. As she did, she slowly began unbuttoning his shirt, wanting to savor every moment. When they were both free of their clothes, Elliot laid Olivia down on the bed and touched and kissed her in all the right places, wishing their time together could last forever.

"Elliot," Olivia pleaded. "Please, Elliot, make love to me."

He entered her smoothly and they moved together, their eyes focused on each other, each recognizing the undeniable love in the other's eyes. When he sensed she was close, Elliot reached down between them, urging Olivia towards her orgasm. Her body clenched around him and she came, drawing him over the edge with her. Blissfully sated, Elliot rolled onto his back and pulled Olivia close, never wanting to let her go. The two of them lay there contentedly, Olivia resting her head on his chest and Elliot drawing lazy circles on her back, neither wanting to breach the topic they knew needed discussed.

_After the lovin', they lie there and talk for awhile_

_She loves how he listens, and he sure loves to see her smile._

_He wants to keep her, but he loves her enough to let her go_

_What a shame she can't get that at home._

_What a shame she can't get that at home_

_There's noting back there but a lonely house_

_And love ain't all about wood and stone._

_He satisfies all her needs and wants_

_What a shame she can't get that at home._

Eventually Olivia decided that they couldn't wait any longer. Propping herself up on her elbow, she looked into Elliot's eyes and began to speak:

"Elliot, how did everything get so messed up? When did everything get so complicated?"

"I don't know, Olivia," he stated. "I honestly don't know. I guess we both had a role in getting things to where they are now. Initially, I think, it was my fault because I went back to Kathy. I thought that if I got back together with her I could convince myself that I didn't love you, that maybe the fact that we shouldn't be together would stop being so hard to bear. But I couldn't ignore it and it didn't get easier. Going back to Kathy actually made things worse because you moved on to someone else and I re-separated from Kathy—it wasn't fair to her or the kids that I wasn't wholly committed to our relationship and me being back was hurting them more than helping. Even after the separation, though, it was too late because you had gotten married."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Olivia questioned. "I wish you would have told me that you felt that way. Of course, though, it's not just your fault…I should have said something too. I wanted to tell you how much I loved you and how much it hurt to think you didn't want me. Instead, I kept my mouth shut and tried to move on because I though you had moved on…but we can both see now how well that all worked out."

"Yeah," Elliot conceded. "If we both weren't such stubborn people we wouldn't be in this mess."

"What are we going to do, Elliot? We can't keep doing this…I don't want to keep lying to my husband. It's not fair to him. I think I have to tell him that I'm not happy, that I want a divorce…I know it's going to crush him but I know I have to tell him soon…it's the only way. I feel awful that I've done this to him because he's been so good to me and I know he really loves me, but I can't give him all of myself when my heart belongs to you."

Elliot leaned up and kissed Olivia, pulling her back down to rest on his chest. "I understand…I felt the same way when I was with Kathy but in love with you. I knew I couldn't keep lying to her, and I know this is going to be hard on you and your husband, but you have to do what your heart tells you is right for _**you**_ no matter what the consequences. And just remember that I love you and want you to be happy."

"I am…with you I am happy." Olivia snuggled closer to Elliot and he kissed the top of her head, understanding that the conversation was over. Olivia wrapped her arm around his waist and closed her eyes, knowing that no matter what happened, with Elliot she was home.

_He satisfies all her needs and wants_

_What a shame she can't get that at home._


End file.
